bean fiending confession
Last weekend I was in icy Chicago to attend the belated Intelligentsia holiday party. Aside from the always inspiring conspiring with colleagues, the highlights of the trip include sleep deprivation, cold weather, too much alcohol, an unshakable common cold, deafeningly loud music, clothes that smell of cigarettes, and my first experience of blood sausage.
But the oddest thing about this trip (aside from it being too short) is that I failed to have any good coffee during my two days there. No visits to any of the three Intelli shops, and even while I was at the roasting works I never caught my breath enough to throw on a pot of coffee or take advantage the Clover brewer I was examining on its tech bench. I’m ashamed to admit it, but I failed as a coffee fiend last weekend - talking about coffee till my voice was hoarse, never actually carving out the opportunity to enjoy any.
But as a devoted slave to coffee with 6+ years of never missing a day of the brew, measures were taken to continue the streak and prevent the pain and violence that would no doubt erupt were my brain to be deprived of the diabolical drug caffeine. The opening salvo of this assault on my palate occured at the LAX airport Starbucks where I made the reasonably safe order of a small brewed coffee (”small” being about a half gallon at the mermaid). The europeans behind me in line seem to have taken a cue from my generous tipping as several more dollars hit the tip box while my cup was being filled - a redeeming moment in an otherwise painful situation. I had visions of certain coffeegeeks I know catching me standing in that long line desperate for my awful fix. I fled the scene before the paparazzi arrived.
My new theory about SBUX’s brewed coffee is that you must drink it immediately so as to scald the tongue thus protecting you from the terrible flavors that will occur as the coffee cools. I managed a few sips walking up the jetway and passed it on to the stewardess to trash it as I boarded. I try to avoid ripping on the Big Green too much (at least they have standards, even if they are terribly low ones), but if this cup was typical of what passes for Specialty coffee for most people, that is a tragedy.
The next morning, left to my own devices in a city I still can’t navigate in, I hit the first independent shop I saw, avoiding the filthy espresso machine and opting for drip. Strike two. The taste of dirty urn. But I was caffeinated and ready enough for the punishing whirlwind of food and drink that was to come.
Monday morning I raced to O’Hare to catch my flight home. I would need a fix to stave off the withdrawal pains that could instigate a Homeland Security incident if I were to board the plane un-coffee’d. I decided to plumb the depths of my weekend as a coffee civilian by bravely stepping up to the golden arches for a styrofoam cup of their “Premium Roast”. Criminal. I choked down a few sips after the half hour it took for the stuff to cool down enough to drink it.
Sometimes I wonder if maybe I and many of my coffee colleagues take this bean snobbery a little too far (answer: of course!). Much in the way that there may be occasions that call for Miller High Life in an aluminum can (no ocassions I can think of though), the simple joy of a cup of hot generic brew surely isn’t a bad thing, right? Wrong. Bad coffee is just bad. There are better ways to get caffeine into your body than suffering through brews so foul that no amount of cream or sugar can fix them.
Which is all a roundabout way of saying that I feel renewed in my zeal about what we’re bringing to Los Angeles - the city that good coffee forgot.
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February 2nd, 2007 at 4:53 pm
Blood sausage is great. Fry some up and then sprinkle a little sugar on top - its amazing. Honestly!
February 2nd, 2007 at 7:27 pm
Cheap shots, pal. Last time I checked 12oz doesn’t equal 64oz. If the flavor is so bad, maybe you should pick up a mountain dew for your fix- oops- smallest size is a 12oz can.
All friendly ribbing aside (love you and the NtLE), what would you rather have- a cup of faceless robusta or a cup of coffee whose origin you know and whose farmers were paid higher than the fair trade floor price.
http://www.starbucks.com/aboutus/pressdesc.asp?id=738
February 2nd, 2007 at 7:29 pm
That is what you get for not calling me about your visit… : )
February 3rd, 2007 at 9:49 am
smoovebcoffee -
not to be pedantic but the prices referenced in the SBUX press release are FOB and not paid to farmers, who are rarely seeing anything close to fair trade floor prices.
I think Starbucks gets a lot of crap from dimwitted activists it doesn’t deserve - the whole Ethiopian trademarking nonsense, and taking a beating on fairtrade when in fact sbux buys more fairtrade coffee than any other company by a wide margin. I’m sure that by and large their buying practices are better than that of most coffee roasters the average consumer has easy access to.
But that cup of coffee I had at LAX was really awful. I don’t know if its representative of what a cup of brew tastes like on a typical SBUX visit, but this one was bad. 12 ounces can feel a lot like a gallon when you’re staring down a cup that offensive.
February 3rd, 2007 at 2:36 pm
Yeah, the “price to farmers”, “fair trade” bit is definitely a two way street that has been talked to death in other forums.
What if we just talk about airport coffee in general? I can’t remember the name, but I saw a chain of restaurants in an airport a while back that was using Intelligentsia. By “chain of restaurants” I of course mean “another series of restaurants constructed, staffed, and run by HMS Host with someone else’s sign overhead.”
I’d challenge you to taste that cup of “airport Intelligentsia coffee” and describe whether you feel it was the best (or even a great) expression of the beans and roast that your colleagues (and perhaps even your own hands) were capable of producing. If it’s not, why could that be?
February 3rd, 2007 at 3:08 pm
good point.
February 4th, 2007 at 1:44 pm
Too bad you weren’t in Seattle. You could have contributed to Chris and Jen’s “Addison College Fund” blend that resides ten inches away from the baristi’s tip jar. The roast supposedly tastes like dark chocolate and shortbread, and only two dollars of it supposedly goes to pay for their kid’s eighteen-years-from-now education. Worthy cause.
February 4th, 2007 at 2:33 pm
I meant I could drive you around…
February 6th, 2007 at 10:32 am
In all fairness to the Mermaid’s coffee, many if not all Starbucks stores that are in Airports or Supermarkets are franchises. This means that the level of quality falls drastically (i.e. not under the supervision of SBUX). When I go to Starbucks (which is necessary sometimes) all I get is drip coffee which can be quite tolerable at times. Here in Seattle I give the northwest Starbucks’ stores a steady rank of decent. Neither drive-thru quality nor Specialty quality.
[As a side note when in Seattle, for a taste of Starbucks that goes relatively above and beyond go to either (a) Pike Place Market (their first store) (b) 2nd and Wall (reportedly their first espresso bar location) (c ) Madison Park (Howard’s store) or (d) Corporate headquarters on first.]
-Mp
February 7th, 2007 at 7:52 am
i would have killed for the timing and positioning to snap a few undercover photos exposing green and arches. f.
the best photos are never taken.
February 14th, 2007 at 12:12 am
…if i can’t have a decent cup of coffee and need a shot of caffeine, sadly, its sugar-free redbull for me…at least it doesn’t put me in a bad mood for drinking terrible coffee and shaking my head as i toss it in the trash can…
February 17th, 2007 at 3:38 pm
Jo’s Coffee in Austin has some nice info on the local scene in this Texas city and has some videos on how to make a mocha. http://joscoffee.com/blog
April 23rd, 2007 at 8:27 pm
Hey Tonx, long time no see or hear! How is life? I was wanting to discuss coffee with you. I landed a job on the big island as a espresso trainer, I actually have a whole crew of people I am training. I hate it so much. I hope the end result will be a coffeehouse similar to an old victrola/vivace/herkemer/diva type place. The main downer…it’s a drive thru.
It’s like the 50’s here in general, and it’s no different in coffee, lot of misconceptions and old views of coffee. So, i am trying my best to train a few like kyle and you and daniel used to train me…it’s quite challenging…:) I am having lots of fun doing what I have come to love!! so it’s got it’s advantages.
Please respond with your personal email address so I can email you. I hope you are well. Maybe you want to come visit the big island sometime and stay with me and my wife…maybe wow people here with you roasting finesse!…keep the offer on the shelf..:) The owner here is buying a 3lb. roaster for small batches of microgrown hawaiian coffee. Gotta go now, hope this email finds you in a good place.
Respectful regards,
Dom
June 9th, 2007 at 9:35 pm
I’m counting myself lucky that I live in NZ right now…
Starbucks are far outnumbered here by other boutique coffee shops and most of them serve something that is reasonably passable as coffee…
“the simple joy of a cup of hot generic brew surely isn’t a bad thing, right? Wrong. Bad coffee is just bad.”
I have to agree… I generally think that those who don’t like coffee have never had really good coffee, or have had too much bad coffee to ever recover…
Cheers,
Robbie.